How to Pull Confidence Out of Thin Air, Starting Today (Easy 4-Step Process with PROOF!)
I was talking to someone the other night who was afraid to run a webinar. A lot of people are. Many of you have "enough" technical skills to do it, enough knowledge about your topic to present, but "something" is holding you back.
Let's change that in this blog post, for you, right now!
Go ahead and look at this page carefully, because it's going to help you make a sale (if you are a marketer), help people (if you are a teacher), conquer public presentations (if you are a speaker), and so on.
First, I am NOT a self-help expert of any kind. But I have run 359 live webinars (697 hours) so I know a couple of things about webinar confidence and public speaking.
You and I both have our own unique set of problems. Let's solve those problems for you, not in one huge step but in a couple of SMALL pieces at a time...
News Flash:
You Have Only Have 8 Emotions (Seriously!)
As a nerdy computer programmer, I like to take apart what makes us work. And according to psychologists (I'm not one and haven't read ANY books about psychology) you have 8 basic emotions:
- joy
- trust
- anticipation
- surprise
- fear
- anger
- sadness
- disgust
That's it! Anything else you feel is either one of these in greater or lesser intensity (i.e. rage, jealousy, distraction, annoyance, interest) or is a combination of these (i.e. love or guilt).
"But dammit Jim, I'm a computer programmer, not a psychologist." That "psychology" explanation looks like a bunch of ideas thrown at me. I like to deconstruct and simplify things.
This information isn't available in any book, only right here. At least not assembled in the way I've done it here. Let's get it into a step by step formula you can apply today.
Eight things are a lot to keep track of... are four key concepts easier? Of course they are. So let's keep in mind that each of these 8 emotions has an OPPOSITE... for example, the opposite of being "happy" is "sad", right?
Four Positives and Four Negatives
That means you really only have four negative and four positive states:
- ANTICIPATION (positive) <--> SURPRISE (positive)
- JOY (positive) <--> sadness (negative)
- TRUST (positive) <--> disgust (negative)
- fear (negative) <--> anger (negative)
(I've put positive emotions in ALL CAPS and negative ones in lower caps to make this more readable.)
The "green" and "orange" colors don't mean good or bad, it's just so you can tell which are the opposites of one another. For example, "joy" and "sadness" are opposites because they have different colors. (This is important for later.)
Here's something else you should notice from these (2 + 2 + 2 + 2) eight states:
- With 2 of the "positive" emotions, the opposite is a positive
- With 2 of the "positive" emotions, the opposite is a negative
- With 2 of the "negative" emotions, the opposite is a positive
- With 2 of the "negative" emotions, the opposite is a negative
You can have all the knowledge and all the skill in the world, but if your emotions (especially fear) hold you back, if you can't "get over yourself" so to speak... then you can't do anything!
This is why so many people have trouble putting up an optin page, can't YET run a live webinar, and so on. Too many negatives holding you back and not enough positives pushing you forward.
How to Change Your Behavior
(The Way That Really Works)
And I think the reason so many people can't get past it is they either let it take them over, try to ignore it, fight it or even go against it.
You have to REDIRECT it and USE it to your advantage. When I was young, I was in (music) band, played sports and gave school presentations probably just like you.
Anytime I "fought" what I was feeling, it distracted me from hitting the baseball. BUT... if I was nervous about playing saxophone in concert, I would use that alertness to do an even better job than I would otherwise.
(Maybe that explains why I was always stuck in leftfield/shortstop/3rd base in baseball, but was 1st/2nd chair in band class?)
To improve any skill, you need to go from:
- unconscious incompetence (unaware you're doing it wrong), to...
- conscious incompetence (find out WHAT you're doing wrong), then to...
- conscious competence (doing it somewhat right even if you have to work at it), and finally...
- unconscious competence (doing it automatically as easily as breathing or driving a car).
The seven stages of grief (shock, denial, anger, bargaining, guilt, depression, acceptance) take you up to "conscious competence."
Twelve step recovery programs (problem, awareness, decision, inventory, admission, readiness, openness, details, repair, inventory, meditation, repetition) stop before you get to "unconscious competence."
Unconscious Incompetence to Unconscious Competence
There are a lot of things I don't know. But I DO know about overcoming your fear of public speaking to run webinars because I've done it. And the secret isn't figuring it all out at once, it's focusing on ONE issue you have (i.e. running one in the first place, slurring your words, stopping for questions, silence or dead air... slowly fixing things, until one day you realize you don't have to try at all...
- 0% of the way there: ground zero
(not online, not doing webinars) - 20% of the way there: unconscious incompetence
(running your first webinar, just doing "something") - 40% of the way there: conscious incompetence
(aware of little things you're doing wrong on a webinar) - 60% of the way there: conscious competence
(fixing little issues i.e. breathing on a webinar) - 80% of the way there: unconscious competence
(running a great webinar automatically)
If you've heard of the 80/20 rule, you know that 20% of the effort will bring you 80% of the results.
Life's 80/20 rule applies here in that the last 80% is the hardest... you can put in just 20% of the effort to achieve an 80% skill level (the beginnings of "unconscious competence") ... but now you're running webinars and doing them correctly: making sales, being a good presenter, recording it, all that good stuff.
Let's connect your "skill" (good or bad) your "emotion" (good or bad)... we want your negative state to be in the past, and your positive state to be in the future, right?
Anger, disgust, fear, and sadness should somehow fit into past -- the "unconscious incompetence" and "conscious incompetence" areas.
Anticipation, joy, trust, and surprise are in your future -- "conscious competence" and "unconscious competence."
When you're incompetent, you're in a negative state. When you're competent, you're positive. But how do you GET there?
Why Don't You Go "Confuse" Yourself!
The key is confusing yourself and let me explain. Think about when somebody won you over by making you laugh, overloading you with information or just confusing you with conflicting information until you gave up. You change your state through confusion.
The lack of confusion is also how you stay in a state, and why you're stuck in the state you're in now. Let's see what happens if we pair the "unconscious" states (beginning and end) with emotions that are NOT opposites, and "conscious" states (middle stages where we're improving) with emotions that ARE opposites -- to add the "confusion" factor where we make a change?
The Exact Roadmap to Do It Today
We get this roadmap of going from "guilt" to "love."
- unconscious incompetence = sadness + disgust = guilt
- conscious incompetence = anger + fear (opposites)
- conscious competence = ANTICIPATION + SURPRISE (opposites)
- unconscious competence = JOY + TRUST = love
(Remember, both "green" or both "orange" next to each other, means they're the same, "green and orange" means they're opposites.)
What you'll do is use fear and anger to rise above the guilt, take some action out of impulse, experience anticipation and surprise once you realize what you're doing, experience the joy of completion and the trust that it's possible to repeat.
Here are the steps you need to go through in order, for example, to get confident with webinars:
Stage 1: Unconscious Incompetence: (sadness + disgust) Do you feel bad because you're not making enough money? Feel guilty because you're not doing enough? It's okay to blame your "past" self for not doing enough... cry it out so you can move past it. Your present and future self WILL run one webinar this week, it's going to happen.
Stage 2: Conscious Incompetence: (anger + fear) Remember when someone said you weren't good enough to do something? That same person would probably say the same about you and webinars.Prove them wrong. Are you jealous of someone else, who has more than you do? It's not fair, you deserve it more than they do! Get mad enough to make a difference.
Maybe you could do a webinar better than "they" would... now you have something they don't.
In any case, your marketing message isn't getting out now -- you need to run at least ONE webinar. Try it. What you've been doing so far isn't working it... attack this head-on.
Stage 3: Conscious Competence: (ANTICIPATION + SURPRISE) You're allowed to be a "little" bit nervous trying something, like webinars, that you haven't done before.But one of the cool things about doing a webinar is that you don't know what's going to happen. Doing a webinar means you have to move outside your comfort zone a little bit, but what have you got to lose?
The absolute worst thing that happens is that no one shows up, or no one likes your webinar, and guess what... you're at the same place you are now! In other words, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Once you do this you'll know where your limits are.
Stage 4: Unconscious Competence: (JOY + TRUST) You completed the hard part... that first 2 minutes of the webinar when you were nervous, and you powered through it to the fun part.You finished your first webinar, and you're already excited about doing another one. Even if just one person said you were great, that made it all worthwhile, didn't it? You can't believe it took you this long to run a live webinar like this. You want to do it again and again. Your next webinar will be even better.
If you're not ready to run webinars, replace "run a webinar" with "make an optin page" ... "setup a payment button" ... or even "exercising" or "quitting your job" or "dating" ...
I'm not saying I know everything about everything, but you can apply what I know about webinar confidence to your own life, so that you can tackle that problem of having a SKILL but not yet having the CONFIDENCE to put yourself out there.
What do you think?
Filed in: Mindset • Productivity
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Wow! This is one long post, so long I have to read it again to make sure I got it right.
Lack of confidence is crippling, that I’m sure about. And while I’m a confident person, there are some areas in my life that I think I must do but I am not confident with at the moment. (which is why I’ll read this again later).
Cheers!
As Mike said, a lot to chew on. Bonus points for the Star Trek reference. Would have given plusgood points for working in “He’s dead, Jim”. And doubleplusgood points for an Arrested Development reference.
“Stuck” at 3rd base/shortstop? You don’t hide anybody at short. You hide kids in RF at low levels, LF at high levels.
Dave,
I was still always bummed out I didn’t get to be 1st baseman at least for one game… I was too skinny, probably.
Hey Nerdy Programmer Guy…
For sure this is THE BEST post that I have read on your blog.
I am not sure that you could have made this post before now, without the having gone through it yourself.
It is really fun to go back and watch old webinars and see how “1 little thing” was worked on at a time.
What I love is how this system actually applies to EVERYTHING.
Lance
Lance,
And what’s really cool is that with some of our students, we’ll see them slowly, slowly, slowly get better at webinars each time…
And sometimes with one person in particular, we didn’t keep in touch with her for a few months, then showed up on one of her webinars and I was thinking, wow… all those incremental improvements really added up fast.
Very interesting Robert, how you have pulled together different ideas. I wonder if you could explain it a bit more simply – your usp – as it didn’t quite all flow easily for me on a first reading.
Jean,
If it’s too much then just skip down to the diagram and that “list” down at the very end. Believe it or not this is the simplified version compared to where I started with this post.
Hi Robert,
I really pay attention to this type of subject matter and am well versed in it. When you said that you would not see this information anywhere else, I have to say you are absolutely right. I speak from experience.
This is stellar information and the best post ever on your blog. This post also caught me by surprise because the subject matter really did not seem like something you would post.
We can have all of our ducks in a row but confidence can certainly hole us back.
Very cool, Robert. You never cease to amaze me!
All the best,
Glen
Hi Glen,
For sure, I definitely stay away from talking about a lot of hocus-pocus self help topics, but as a technical person, and someone who teaches technical stuff… I see this over and over again. It’s easier than ever to record video, build a list, setup a web page, run a webinar, all that good stuff but a lot of people still can’t do it, or there’s a way to over-complicate it, or there’s another excuse not to do it.
I have to agree with Lance, this is one of your best blog posts. Your enthusiasm is bleeding through!
fear is a state of mind.
so to get a rid the fear off
you gotta to teach your mind
to let it go.
and the mind itself has a biological-mechanism
of to do so.
what you need then is a step by step route
to direct and, better said, control
your mind.
i do not promote david valleries’
but he just released his latest way
to get all of your fear of anything
and change it into what you long wanted
whatever you want to do with your self
.
i see this article serves as foundation
and david’s stuff give you an exact way
to do so
.
anyway, well done Robert!
it’s worth indeed waiting your blog coming out finally
after a series of email you sent lately.
Hi Sudar, I’m glad you liked the build-up. I was a little bit nervous about this blog post since it was kind of out there, but:
1. scheduling the post
2. scheduling the emails for it
3. building it up so much
Pretty much guaranteed I had to let it get out there to see what people thought.
Robert,
Excellent comprehensive overview of what gets in the way for MOST of us at any given time. I’ve decided that the technical proficiency or core principles that will make us successful. It is the crisis of confidence that keeps them in a place of inaction that cripples them.
I’ve been thinking about how to help people flip the switch…seeding confidence builders and taking mini-actions that move people forward! What if… each of us did this in an area where we feel a lack of confidence! It has the potential to rock our world!
Thanks for inspiring us to move forward by noticing more clearly where we are and where we want to be!
Kathie
great post Robert, you are absolutely correct. Fear is paralasis while taking action will will help clear the mental fog.
thanks for the clarity.
That’s right Marshall, and there’s tons of times when I’m somewhat “afraid” to do something but I go through with it anyway… what’s the worst that could happen?
Robert,
Excellent comprehensive overview of what gets in the way for MOST of us at any given time. I’ve decided that it takes more than technical proficiency or core principles to create a successful business. It is the crisis of confidence that keeps us in a place of inaction that cripples us.
I’ve been thinking about how to help people flip the switch…seeding confidence builders and taking mini-actions that move people forward! What if… each of us did this in an area where we feel a lack of confidence! It has the potential to rock our world!
Thanks for inspiring us to move forward by noticing more clearly where we are and where we want to be!
Kathie
For sure Kathie, it’s all about taking action… we hear that so much that it’s become a cliche.
The problem isn’t lack of ideas (we all have tons), creativity (it’s way easier to talk about something or doodle on a page and think about “theory”), or intelligence (I know a few people who are too smart for their own good) it’s just doing anything.
I just can’t believe how many forum threads or blog discussions where people are gossiping about how great Twitter and Facebook are doing… or how to protect their intellectual property, or keep their business on autopilot after they die… when they’re not even at that point yet.
The simplicity of the 8 emotions is brilliant. Breaking them down into positives and opposites is creative genius.
This started off pretty simple but as it progressed, it seemed more and more as though it was written by a programmer! 🙂 Too much to process in on reading.
The video recording pulled it together very well.
Wow, this is an amazing blog post!
I really loved how you added the different stages of competence to emotions.
Most people usually don’t associate the logical and emotional parts together and it really goes to show you that depending on your emotions, you can tell where you are when building a new skill.
Public speaking is the number one fear followed by death!
By using this system, it shows you what you should focus on to get better and work towards the end goal by setting different milestones along the way.
Although the beginning stages are made up of the negatives, you need to think long term and see where you will be in the end as a great positive.
Robert mentioned that it’s all about moving outside of your comfort zone. If you don’t do something different you won’t be successful especially if what you are doing now is not working!
Thanks Robert
Hey Robert:
An innovative breakdown on some classic change principles and psychology.
Your insights and ideas to apply them are simple and practical.
I will borrow some of this material when I work with my patients as a therapist!
Keep it up, man.
Miles
WOW Robert! Very good!
I can still remember wayyyy back when I was nervous as hell to speak in front of the classroom or to speak in front of a group of people… that fear is still there but as you (and nike) say, one of the best ways to get through it is to ‘just do it’.
Although some of that fear is still there in some of the situations I am in, I still find that just doing it gets you through it.
Ron
Ron,
Right… you’re only nervous for the first couple of minutes, and once you get into the groove, you’re all good.
Just watch any reality show on TV… why do people act like there are no cameras around? Because it’s awkward for the first couple of minutes, and then they completely forget.
The bottom line is that the quickest accelerant to ANYTHING you’ll ever find is the ability to write that email, call that person on the phone or present in front of an audience… might as well conquer the #1 fear known to mankind in history, that way anything other challenge you face will seem easy by comparison.
Wow. Need to read that one again…
One guy said, “Every level of income demands a different you.” – and that’s how I’m feeling at the moment.
I’m realising I don’t need any more skill, or technical understanding, as much as I need a healthy dose of CONFIDENCE!
The confidence can probably come from understanding, or skill, but for me it’s more along the lines of “Cometh the hour. Cometh the man.” Nothing like having your back to the wall to bring out new-found confidence.
Thanks Robert 🙂
Hi Graeme,
“Every level of income demands a different you.” Too true… I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard someone tell me they’re, “thinking the way Donald Trump would” or “the way Bill Gates would” … but these people aren’t making any money yet.
I definitely looked at everything differently when I made $100/month, $1000/month, $10K/month, and so on. Different priorities, different things I would pay for, different things I would do on my own and outsource…
If anyone out there isn’t making money yet… it’s not like you have to work-work-work-work and BOOM! get that big break… you conquer one small milestone, get a good payoff, keep going… get to the next milestone.
But that’s good news, because you won’t become a one hit wonder, you don’t have to suffer before you make money… it’s more important to be bold and try new things — than correct them — than it is to “be right” … because you probably won’t be right the first time. Maybe the 2nd or 3rd time, so let’s plow through those mistakes as fast as possible to get to the fun part.
Hi Robert,
Wow! That’s some deep stuff. You’re so right. fear really can sabotage so much, and it’s important to get a grip on it.
I find it very interesting how you wove those various approaches about learning together into this pretty massive blog post.
I’ll have to reread it to get all the info out of it, as some of the others above have pointed out.
I’m also going to send it to a friend of mine with whom I’ve had discussions about learning. I think he’ll like your approach.
Thanks much,
Elisabeth
Who is still butchering her webinars but getting a bit better…
Elisabeth,
You are running webinars now?? Heck yeah, I don’t think I’m on your list anymore. I went to your blog (the link in your comment) but there was no optin box. I would love to attend one of your webinars for a few minutes and see how far you’ve come.
This was the best post you have done.
With “CONFIDENCE” you can change anything in your life for the better as long as you apply it.
Did you discover some of this information via NLP lessons?
Success comes from getting off of the bench and playing the game. I have discovered the one program that has helped with my confidence which is http://www.newbiecrusher.com.
Thanks
Hi Curtis,
I know a tiny bit about NLP, but not a ton. To be honest I was thinking about researching, and becoming certified in NLP at one point, until everyone I met who was NLP certified, had a tendency of being terrible at communicating and used tons of “invented” terminology just to discuss every day ideas.
Luckily you don’t need to know about NLP to change your state, be happy, be productive, or be successful. I noticed that I was “redirecting” fear, anger, and all that stuff into positive things long before I had even heard of NLP… and people who didn’t do this, who tried to fight their fear, just didn’t seem to “get it.”
One really powerful technique you can use is this: associating an emotion with a memory, image, or sound and distorting it into what you want. For example, if I want to get angry I think back to playing baseball, and my Dad yelling at me when I couldn’t hit the ball at a young age.
I think back to that and imagine, instead of him yelling at me about baseball, it’s about webinars. Now suddenly I feel like I have to run a great webinar just to prove him wrong, and I’m using the “fear” state to run a great webinar.
Your imagination really is an awesome tool, you might as well use it, right?
This post is very interesting, even for retired psychologists. A good decision will be to read the blogpost at least 10 times, maybe 100. Just to let the ideas take place in you or to be integrated as a part of your way to act.
Hi,
I am going to have to go over this a couple times…but very nice post.
I am of the opinion that every thing “negitive” at it root starts with “fear”…and then it leads to evry thing you mentioned above….again I will have to go over your post a few times…like many have already said…a lot to digest at first reading…
Best To All,
Dan
Dan,
If you think that “everything” starts with fear then maybe you are past the guilt and anger stages. If that’s what you’re really focusing on with your own shortcomings (we all have them) then you should definitely focus on the fear the most to correct your life and motivate you to do great things.
I’m not sure I know how to explain it, but the stronger your “fear” is holding you back, the more powerful a tool it is to push you into doing what you want… in other words, if that’s the ONE THING that gets you the most worked up about not doing enough, not doing anything, or failing at something… then that’s the same thing you’ll use to actually get stuff done.
For example if you’re “afraid” of running a webinar, and you’re imagining people laughing at you doing a crappy webinar… then start thinking even further ahead in the future about those same people laughing at you for NOT doing a webinar. I’d rather run a few bad webinars now, to get past the growing pains and run some successful webinars, then pitch really great, use those webinars to make products and now I can put those people in their place.
Robert,
There’s some great material here. Excellent stuff.
I have worked with a lot of clients over the last 20 years, and what I have found is that a number of issues are in the way of them moving forward.
1. Some people have a ‘winning life script’ and others a ‘losing life script’. This comes from a decision we made round about the age of 4 or 5 about how our life will turn out. One way to find out which script someone has is to ask a question like this: “In 5 years from now, will your life be better than it is now, worse than it is now, or about the same?”
I ran personal growth seminars in the UK, US and Australia, and I got attendees to close their eyes. I asked them that question and asked them to put their hands up to signify which of the 3 options fitted them. About 40% of people indicated that their life would be *worse* in 5 years, and about another 20% said it would be about the same — despite the fact that these were people who bought a lot of personal growth books and had attended a number of personal growth courses, as well as my own.
2. People have ‘limiting beliefs’ which hold them back: “I don’t know anything”; “I don’t want to try something then fail as I’ll feel worse than I do now”; “If I try this and fail I’d rather die”.
3. Some people put themselves beneath others, rather than see others as equals. So they may know a lot about a subject, like internet marketing — and more than other ‘gurus’ but they minimise themselves.
4. Some people are perfectionist: everything has to be just right before they’ll proceed with, say, recording a webinar.
There are others, but I’ll stop there.
The key for anyone who feels stuck is to realise that everyone can make a unique contribution to the world. Everyone is an expert on something, and people would dearly love to learn from them. There is no need to be a perfectionist in this business: launch a 40% ‘good enough’ version of your webinar/ebook/report etc as quickly as you can, and refine it later. One person’s 30-40% is another person’s 90-100%. Trying things and failing is part of life. Dead ends and backtracking is normal and okay. Persistence and resilience really help. Don’t try to ‘eat an elephant’: break a project down into tiny steps and proceed from the first to the last…
And taking daily actions like reading the fascinating posts on this site then implementing one idea that comes into your head as a result, especially if it’s a stretch. One such action may lead to another and another, and before you know it you may have a very productive day.
Thanks again, Robert for this post.
Chris
Hey Chris,
Thank you too for the awesome two cents you’ve added to this post…
It really amazes me how many people visualize their future as bleak or ugly… or just how anything they imagine in general, such as an upcoming meeting or their to-do list… as some dark, messsy, dangerous place… and then wonder why they fail.
I don’t know how to correct that kind of behavior. I have never been homeless, but I have been very poor, and I noticed that around age 20, when I started to have a positive attitude, and hope for the best… that my life improved.
It makes sense. If you’re certain the future will suck, then in order for you to be consistent, you have to sabotage yourself in order for everything to make sense. You might even not realize what you’re doing… it’s way too easy to blame the universe, the economy, or your boss for your problems.
On the other hand if you have a real, positive, and attainable goal, then things don’t seem “right” until you get to that goal — financial or otherwise — and when you do hit that goal (you will if it’s a certainty in your mind) then you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to do… and you can move on to the next thing.
This is really good. I agree with Lance that it applies to just about everything.
One thing I noticed (because it puzzled me till I read farther) was that under
How to Change Your Behavior
(The Way That Really Works)
The fourth item in the list is
conscious incompetence (doing it automatically as easily as breathing or driving a car).
From reading farther on, it’s clear that you really meant to write “unconscious competence” there.
Thanks for teaching us a systematic way to work through fears.
Kathleen,
Good catch. I’ve corrected the post. More evidence that we don’t have to be perfect the whole time, you CAN edit it or redo everything you do on the internet, and as a marketer (everyone is, no matter what their niche is) you can always relaunch with version 2.0.
I’m glad you paid enough attention to notice the mistake… I wouldn’t have corrected it otherwise. As always, you’re the best!
Great post Robert. It is always great when you can break down the steps to overcoming your obstacles.
Hey Lynn,
Honesty, I think that any task you have — no matter how big — can be broken into four steps. And if there’s more than four steps involved, then your goal is too big.
NASA invented the phrase “the next logical step” … they wanted to land on the Moon, which meant they’d have to get something in orbit, figure out how to land it safely, put a human in orbit, and actually land something on the Moon.
They had even bigger plans that which they never realized such as a permanent space station orbiting Earth, another one orbiting the Moon and another one orbiting Mars, to finally send a manned mission to Mars but you have to take the small steps before you go for the big steps, right?
Robert,
Best Post Ever.
I did “Webinar Crusher” with you way back in 2009. What I learned on that course destroyed any pre-conceived ideas i had about my presentational skills.
I had confidence in my own abilities , you provided the tiny details to make that a success.
I love presenting live now. I have no qualms about tacking a subject head on “Plank” Style.
Thanks Robert for the analysis and for sharing your unique style.
Kevin
Hey Kevin,
What’s up dude? It’s been a while.
For sure, it doesn’t make sense to present something without recording it, or slaving away on “the perfect” sentence to write… when you can present it on a webinar, or even better in person! (but you can reach a wider audience in person)
Whenever I’m presenting (doesn’t matter if it’s a webinar or on stage), I always have this idea in the back of my mind that I’m “redirecting” any anxiety to some other place… and I make sure to keep smiling and always be that “asshole” / goofball / silly clown kind of presenter… always happy, having a good time where nothing can get me down. That way I can focus on what I’m presenting and instead of being nervous about what “other” people think… life’s too short to worry about something like that.
You continue to amaze me, Young Jedi! This is a whole different level of thinking. I know that all of us appreciate your taking the time to think through and logic this out.
This IS your best blog post – to this point. As always you delivered on your promise. This will be a piece we continue to reference for quite a while.
Thank you – for sharing this, taking the time to do it, providing it in multiple formats, for being YOU!
What’s up Jeanette?
As you know this is totally a subject I am passionate about… realizing your goals is way too general for me but getting people to run their own webinars… that’s totally where I’m at.
It’s funny how this blog post came about. I just talked someone into getting over their fears into running a webinar the way I usually do… get them worked up, angry and excited about running one, then get it scheduled and get it “out there” and public so they can’t back out. Because even when we’re excited now we’ll probably be less excited later when the adrenaline wears off.
I’m no different… I go through the exact same cycles as everyone else. If I didn’t schedule my webinars, autoresponder followups, email broadcasts, blog posts, all that good stuff, in advance… if it wasn’t all scheduled at least a day or two ahead of time in the calendar, then I probably would find a reason to “back out” on most stuff.
Luckily people like you and I are cautiously optimistic and trust/distrust ourselves enough to force Future Robert and Future Jeanette to get that webinar out and launch that product when we need to.
You had to email me 3 times for this?
Heck yeah I did Colin, and based on the responses here, it was worth it.
Hi Robert,
This is a post that lived up to your “advertising”! The lack of confidence is something everyone I have ever met has felt at one time or another.
I wasn’t quite sure where you were going with the emotions, but I hung in there and realized how you translated them into actions to overcome the lack of confidence.
This was and will continue to be useful to me.
Thanks.
Warren
Hi Warren,
I’m glad you stuck with me. I resisted this kind of information as well when I was first getting stared online… but it’s really important to understand how you work if you ever want to become self motivated and be your own boss.
In fact, I wonder how different my life would have been — and how much faster I would have quit my job — if I had only looked into some kind of motivational material or wondered why I was able to overcome some emotional or mental obstacles and not others.
Even something as simple as contacting a new potential joint venture partner or hailing a cab from the airport to get to a seminar.
Moving out of your comfort zone and trying new things that make “logical” sense to move your business and your life forward… almost always pay off. Even if it’s a complete failure, it’s still a learning experience.
You’ll probably live longer and enjoy your life more, too.
Reading time: 8-14 minutes, watching next almost 20 minutes and…. it was worth to spent my time on it. From begin to end. Awesome, thanks Robert.
Christopher
Christopher,
I’m glad you liked it and that it was worth your time. Many other commenters here say they’ll be coming back to this page again and again.
It definitely can’t hurt to make a note on your calendar to visit this page in 6 months, or even bookmark it in case you’re ever feeling down and need a pick me up.
Each one of us is on our own journey, and you can’t appreciate the successes until you’ve moved through the failures… I hope that isn’t too new-agey for you.
Excellent Detail Robert!
I know you wanted to receive a comment that would let you know if ‘we’ think it was the best post or the worst post. I know it is good.. but is it the best, I don’t know? You have a lot of great content and ideas on your blog so I’m not ready to jump in and say this is the best. But it is a great topic and very important to look at and get comfortable with.
I will think about this and I will work toward getting to the 80% of stage 4.
Things that make you go…. Hmmmm? I’ll come back to this a few times in the future, I am sure of that!
Thank you for going so deep about this important stuff!
xox
HelenRappy
Helen,
I’m glad you liked the post. On a personal note to you, one big transition I made from being unsuccessful, to being successful, was having an opinion.
If you don’t think this is the best post on my blog, I won’t be offended. But you’ve either seen a better post somewhere on this site, in which case this particular post ISN’T the best I have (you like something better), or this post is better than anything else I’ve ever posted on RobertPlank.com.
Either way, you should have an opinion. You’re going to JV with this person or you aren’t. You’re going to try this advertising method or you aren’t. You’re going to have this headline on your sales letter or you aren’t. Black and white.
By having an opinion, will you alienate some people? Of course… but the way I see it, you have two options:
Option #1: Don’t have an opinion… you blend in, you’re forgettable, the same as everyone else. No one loves you or hates you.
Option #2: You have an opinion. Half the people hate you, half of the people love you. The people who hate you remove themselves from your list, they stop reading your blog… they would have caused you headaches and would never have bought anyway. You’re left with the half that loves you.
That’s what tiny list big profits, quality over quantity, all that good stuff is all about… have something to say, be yourself, have an opinion. Where would Sarah Palin, Mother Theresa, Oprah, Barack Obama or George W. Bush be if they didn’t have opinions?
I was listening to the video Robert and it was absolutely amazing, until..
My girl started asking me something..
I prized the earphones away from my ears only to hear a question no man would have ever thought possible…
“Why is this air conditioning remote not working?”
jeeez..
I proceeded to repair the remote and try to ‘get back with’ your video..
2 minutes later after listening to your video I was slowly deciphering the ‘patterns of life’ and planning future world domination, when suddenly..
the poodles started playing up, (my girl insist they must be around by the way)..
urgh..
Now I’m back to posting a reply to an amazing blog post that could have inspired my entire multi mill-yun dollar biz..
and instead I’m stuck with with an angry gal and 2 annoying poodles..
Well it is 3 am here..
Inspiring!
John B
Your best post? Naah… I’ve seen better to be honest, and Lance already posted on this a way back and the influence is clear to see. The truth is… I’m just kidding you, this did feel like a landmark. 🙂
You obviously were on a roll here because you put extra effort into prettifying this post with graphics and structures. I liked those a lot, I kept skip-reading to get to the next diagram faster 🙂
The reason I really like this post? I think it is the latest and greatest incarnation of the evolving process that you’ve been practising all along. In the past you’ve put this idea out there but applied to a specific instance, e.g. Keep It Shippable, Stupid was partly about having the confidence to tear up the playbook and find the most effective method of flying by the seat of your pants.
This time you’ve put down in words a general framework that gathers up all those stray comments you’ve been feeding us on countless webinars, and points everything in the right direction.
You’ve been saying this kind of thing all along, just in different ways, and I’m sure this won’t be the last time you’ll revisit this fertile ground. And that’s the true strength of this post, picking up on this consistent DNA through all your posts and webinars. But this post spoke to me very clearly, and crucially, the way you wrote it left me feeling a lot less scared about what could go wrong. Knowing that (and how) you got this far on your journey is a great fear-killer. It’s like watching someone else do a parachute jump, and they land and you say to yourself ‘Well, they didn’t die.’ and then you go and do your own parachute jump.
You even demonstrated that it doesn’t matter if you make mistakes, by making a mistake. (In the first list you put ‘conscious incompetence’ when you meant to put ‘unconscious competence’ but hey, that kind of thing just got Donald Rumsfeld even more fame so it’s a great marketing tool!)
Overall Robert, the thing that keeps me going even when I see no light at the end of the tunnel, is that you and Lance never stop. You’ve been sharing your journey with us for quite some time now, and it helps me, and it’s a big deal. When I look up ahead I see you guys, and so I just keep going. Because I see that you did it, I change my beliefs about what is possible.
Thanks for doing it yourself and challenging us to make it too.
Best regards,
Paul
P.S.
I’m glad you included ‘exercising’ in your list at the end, as while I read this post what kept coming up for me was my reluctance to go exercise even though I know (!!!) that I’ll enjoy it once I get back into it. What the heck’s that all about, huh? 🙂
Paul,
The thing that really grabbed me about your reply was: “You and Lance never stop.”
You can’t stop growing. Ever. If you’re not growing, or you’re maintaining, you’re dying. Period.
I used to be happy making $10K a month… that I could just “maintain” that level of income and everything would all work out. Then I started (stupidly) day trading. I turned my nest egg at the time of about $17K into $30K in a period of 6 months in the stock market, and lost it all in a couple of weeks over my only risky trade.
But in that time I noticed that the stock prices of volatile companies like Apple, Microsoft, and Yahoo were all hurt even if the stockholders didn’t think they were growing “fast enough” … in other words, they were hiring tons of new employees, making great progress on the latest iPhone or MacBook, but their stock price was dropping because they had only gone from 10% market share with smartphone instead of 20%.
Theoretically, if someone was buying stock in your company, would they make a profit or just “maintain?” If you’re not growing then figure out how to do more, charge more, or get your stuff in front of the eyeballs of more people because you never know what catastrophe might happen in the next few years, months or weeks… you’ve got to push as hard as you can because the future is too unpredictable. Don’t maintain, move yourself to the next step.
Wow, Robert! I think most people would turn this into about 3 dozen separate posts. Thanks for all the info and motivation! I am saving to read again and I know I’ll absorb more the 2nd time… and no doubt each time after that! Thank you for the inspiration. And i love your graphs and drawings. 🙂
Evelyn
Evelyn,
You’re right, I could split this into tons and tons of posts but what would be the fun in that? Better to get this issue out of the way for people so we can get the next obstacle out of the way.
Honestly, I wrote this post out, edited it a little bit, and then realized how crazy it was. The drawings were definitely necessary. No matter what you’re teaching, even if they’re abstract concepts, even if you have to repeat your information two, three, four times… drawings always make a big difference. If I was reading this post for the first time I would probably skip to the pretty drawings too.
What an interesting take on an very familiar process! Thanks so much for bringing this out in this very clear presentation. I also appreciate it that you provided the transcription to the video as this makes it much easier for me to read and grasp what I am reading.
I had always known about the unconscious competence but didn’t realize how little it took to get to, as I always thought that it was a long term prospect.
Thanks for make this a lot clearer to me now.
Scary as it is to take that first step, it is a lot more pleasant now that I know it is going to lead to a future that will be filled with a lot of anticipation as well as a fun time.
I appreciate it that you took the time to make this presentation and thank you.
As far as I am concerned this is one of the best blog posts I have read.
thank you.
Joe Cepeda
Joe: “As far as I am concerned this is one of the best blog posts I have read.” That’s a huge honor, thank you.
It’s way too easy to plan things for the future. I’ll plan a day to clean the house. I’ll lose 20 pounds this year.
What if you don’t even see the end of this year? It could happen. Brain aneurysm. Heart attack. Hit by a bus. You just never know.
It’s way easier to figure out what you can do in the next 14 days. Even a small goal that moves you in the right direction. Keep going once you hit that goal.
Let’s see, the basic gist is Maslow + Plutchik = Webinar Success.
Dave,
Since I’m not a psychologist and haven’t taken any classes on the subject, I hadn’t heard of either of those guys. I had to look them up.
If you’re already familiar with their teachings, and that helps you identify, remember and absorb the information… then more power to you! Seriously, do whatever it takes to get you to that small goal, even if it’s something that seems scary on the outside such as hosting a one hour webinar. Do whatever it takes to get over that hump and complete that task. I believe in you. I know you can do it.
Hey Robert,
I do believe that you are right…and wrong at the same time.
Is this your “best” post ever? In terms of content, I believe so. In terms of usefulness, probably so again. In terms of education…again, probably yes!
The only one that was possibly more important and your “best” was your very first post.
Why? Because without it, I would have never been able to read this (and use) this one.
A great example of your system hard at work has allowed all of us to benefit from your unconscious competence in at least one field.
Thank you ever so much!
Rog,
That is a pretty zen responsive for me but I’ll take it. You’re right, I couldn’t have posted this post as the first thing on my blog, this is the result of years of typing, thinking… all that good stuff.
There’s no way any of us could have thought of fire, the wheel, algebra, computers, the internet, on our own… it’s all the result of thousands of years of trial and error.
Same thing with doing business on the internet… there are things that will always work like sales letters, setting up an optin page, having an autoresponder followup sequence… that you would have never thought of on your own. It makes way more sense to choose one system, follow it, and follow in their footsteps than start from scratch.
Hi Robert,
Deep, thought-provoking post. I had to come back and read it when I could give it my full attention. It also helped to come back and watch the video to solidify the blog post. Thank you for pointing out how to overcome the emotional blocks that hold us back.
I have figured out that my strength in my veterinary practice is client education. Now I need to find a way to monetize that.
Great job on this post!
Dr. Debra,
Easy way to monetize that… use the veterinary contacts you have with other doctors and authority figures and run a webinar for their audience. You wanted this year to be a huge improvement than the years before, right? So do it. Simple.
Hey RP, novel mashup of learning theory, motivation and a bit of extra models thrown in. Best post? Not IMHO , only because it’s out of left field for you and there are so many other great posts on here. But thought provoking in terms of conjoining disparate concepts. You’ve certainly deconstructed and blended well – lots of thought and effort gone into it. Your fundamental premise is right but most of us here are at least at conscious incompetence – we are aware of our lack of skill (belief/confidence) in running webinars. So you’re right, fear and frustration go with that in moving to the next stage of learning. Courage moves us from CI to CC and confidence moves us from CC to UC. That’s my take on it. Either way it involves doing. Cheers.
Hi Jase,
If someone told you, “I would give you one million dollars to run just one webinar” … would you do it?
Of course you would. That’s a good starting point. You’re physically capable of doing it, you can even find a way to get over your hangups to do it, it’s just a matter of the payoff.
1 million dollars would get you over being scared to run a webinar… how about $500,000? $100,000? $50,000? $10,000? $1,000? 100 bucks?
100 dollars for one hour of your life? You probably would have spent that time watching The Biggest Loser or The Amazing Race making zero dollars.
You can physically do it… you can mentally do it… you just have to play the right “mind game” with yourself to become out-of-character with yourself long enough to run one webinar or make that one life changing decision.
Robert,
That was an amazing post.
I didn’t even realize it, but I’ve been helping husbands go from the “unconscious incompetence” state to the “unconscious competence” state with their wives so that they can have a happy and harmonious marriage.
I did substitute “webinar” with “Creating a sales page” and every bit of what you said is true. Now I can clearly recognize where I’m at.
Now all that’s left for me is to apply this principle to myself and internet marketing, and push through fear that’s been blocking me.
Thank you Robert, you inspire me.
Hey Robert,
You’ve written so many great posts that I think you would have to run a split test or two to determine whether this one is the winner. This is one of your best, in any event.
You bring a fresh approach to a topic that often gets clouded by incense and, as you say, hocus-pocus.
Your insistence on being seen as a “technical guy” and not a “self-help expert” gets your toe in door of the minds of those spooked by the language used by a few misguided people who try to profit by increasing the confusion about the way the mind works.
You show that the mind loves clarity and simplicity. It works best with systems because the most powerful part of the mind filters for repeating patterns. And that what systems are.
You demonstrate that recognized patterns of the body and mind that are known to be safe and effective can be executed with incredible speed, since the mind doesn’t have to process any new information.
That’s why systems are so effective.
When the mind has to analyze and understand, it moves much more slowly.
You make it easy to see that emotions are key.
The problem is that our culture doesn’t teach that emotions are the mind’s method of motivating us to act to keep us alive, the same way that traffic lights get us safely to our destination.
Fear is just the mind signaling us that something unknown is coming our way, and that we should pay attention (analyze and understand) in case we need to take action to avoid injury.
Other, more fun emotions, keep the species going.
Nothing to freak out about. Do you panic when the light turns yellow as you reach an intersection?
Stop. Look. Listen. And move on.
I like your reference to redirecting the energy of emotions. In my opinion, all emotions are positive for the reasons explained above. Some emotions, however, can move us in the wrong direction, or push us off track.
All emotions give us energy. So after the danger has been acknowledged and acted upon if necessary, the remaining energy should be redirected to move us farther in the desired direction instead of slowing us down.
I think you are one of those people who seem excited about everything because you are so good at redirecting your emotions.
So maybe you don’t consider yourself a self-help guru, but you definitely explain and show by example how the mind works and how anyone can become confident if they follow your system and your example.
Roger
Great post Robert,
Why? Because I have been scrolling up and down it, for the last half hour or so, trying to work out what to do next.
Influenced by you, I have done TWO webinars in the last year (wow, round of applause).
Both went OK. With very very conscious, reasonable competence, I would say. But perhaps a little dull. However, I overcame the fear (and there was plenty), using some of your excitement and anticipation about something new.
Trouble is, it all fizzled out. The excitement did not last, because I did not have a plan in place (ie a product to sell). I had no push to keep it going.
So what now, after this counselling session?
What I should do is reactivate my webinar account. Then, run a free webinar with plenty of content, to sell a live webinar class (about WordPress, because I know plenty). Yes, it’s your supreme model of product creation…
Will I? I should.
Sincerely,
Kevin
Kevin,
Even if you buy private label rights to a product, and put it online, that’s something you can pitch on a webinar. You make the replay available only for a limited time and then bundle that webinar recording as a bonus so now you have a unique offer.
Hi again Robert,
Going out on a limb here…
I have just done step 1 of my comment above (reactivating my webinar account) and have scheduled a webinar for next Thursday at 2pm EST (I think).
Yours hoping I won’t fall flat on my face.
All the best
Kevin
Sounds great Kevin, I’ve registered for your webinar.
One thing that I think will help you over time is, catch yourself whenever you make a negative statement.
When you say: “Yours hoping I won’t fall flat on my face.” All you can think about now is failing. Same with all kinds of phrases like, “You won’t regret this.” Now I’m thinking about regretting it.
Instead you should say, “I’ll do great.” If you stop every time you’re about to say it or type it, eventually you’ll think that way too.
This is a great post, Robert. What you are really unpacking here is the source of resistance — yours, mine, and ours. As marketers, we have to deal with our own resistance to what we ought to be doing (but can’t find the motivator button), or to doing what we hate but that has to get done somehow.
Then we have to deal with customer resistance to buying. That has so many levels, but what you outline here is a fairly simple blueprint to thinking through how to present a product or service in ways that totally bypass the customer resistance that is always there.
And finally — if you want to get REALLY deep — there is a cultural resistance to change. That one’s tough too — but not impossible. It really begins with understanding — and as far as I can tell (and hope) there is no end 🙂
Thanks for an outstanding experience today!
Nancy
I know these are just words…but really there should be a 5th level…unconscious brilliance (maybe not the right word), but competence implies an average skill level …brilliance implies the exceptional… a combination that relies on repetition, the willingness to fail, expert instruction and practice, and natural talent…maybe that is what genius is…
Bob,
Why worry about being “brilliant” at something? How would you even know? Compared to who or what? And I would still consider that part of unconscious competence… you’re just more competent at it approaching 100 percent… let’s keep it simple.
Hi Robert,
You obviously put a lot of thought & work into this post, and it is very helpful.
Indeed the biggest hurdle with having a Webinar (besides not having a list) is the fear of many things like: failure, rejection, nobody showing up, etc.
Thank you for sharing your insights.
Donna
Donna,
And once you break the big problem down into those little problems, they’re easy to tackle head on. What if nobody likes the webinar? So what… figure out what they didn’t like about it. What if no one shows up? Who cares… you have the practice and the recording. Even the worst case scenario (especially on the internet) is not as bad as you think (not even close) when you think about it.
Robert
WOW Robert,
That’s alot to take in. But also very
good info. I’m kinda busy right now so
I just scanned it. I’ll definitely read
it again.
Thanks Barbie
Barb,
Thanks for scanning it. The good thing about this post is I structured it so you could come back again and again. If you’re short on time the best thing to read are the four stages on the bottom. If you absorb them enough by taking repeated action then you can go back and figure out why they work, and why you’re supposed to go through those steps in that order.
Hi Laura,
I’m glad that you are getting somewhere. The “easy way out” is to use being scared as an excuse. The right thing is to just do it anyway.
Hi Robert,
You wrote, in response, to my comment above…
“It really amazes me how many people visualize their future as bleak or ugly… or just how anything they imagine in general, such as an upcoming meeting or their to-do list… as some dark, messsy, dangerous place… and then wonder why they fail.”
Part of the problem is that, nowadays people are stressed rather than relaxed about life. The media has shown them inside homes that are very grand etc… and taught them to compare their lives with others. So many people don’t fee okay in their own skin.
A good question to ask is… “Am I okay with myself right now in my life? Do I *feel* like a millionaire? Do I love what I see in the mirror? Can I look into those eyes staring back at me and love myself?”
I think most people can’t do that. (Or rather, most of the people I work with can’t.)
So they are in a ‘position’ in Transactional Analysis (which I find fascinating) of “I’m not okay with me.”
They then see other people as worse off than them and may feel unsettled by this, or better off than them and feel inferior to them.
This position is “You (plural) are not okay with me” and often they judge the world: “The world is not okay with me.”
So you can look at an individual and ask yourself: “Does this person love themselves? Do they love other people (in general)? Do they love the world they are in?” If you can’t say YES!!! to all 3 questions then from a T.A. (Transactional Analysis) perspective they will feel as follows…
– a sense of futility and hopelessness
– that life should be easier than it is
– bored with life
– getting nowhere in life
… so why bother??!
…which I think the people you talk about above is where they’re at.
When we encounter new people and new situations, and we’re not in love with life, the more ‘primitive’ part of the brain automatically feels threatened.
Young children, in love with life, move towards new people and situations. ‘Not okay’ adults recoil — even if in just a small way.
The trick to change is to get back to feeling okay with ourselves: seeing ourselves as our families and friends see us (or at least some of them!) — as miracles!
It can be done in a few hours with support: all that matters is motivation. And that comes from a decision to say: “Finally I’m going to master MYSELF *first*, then, from there, master my LIFE.”
Once you do that it’s amazing what you can do.
Thanks again for writing this post Robert. And for inspiring me to put my thoughts on paper.
And thanks for your products: there are some truly terrific ideas in Time Management On Crack which simply aren’t touched on in the classic works on the subject. It’s a pleasure to know you through your material.
Chris,
The thing about the media making a big deal out of everything is interesting, because for a long time (probably until college age) I always thought the world was about to end, I watched the doom-and-gloom news all the time… until I found out that most things are improving. For example, there are way less murders, child abductions, that kind of thing since the 1950s… we just didn’t report on it back then.
As far as the MTV cribs factor, it’s so weird to see people who are TOO successful or so far ahead of you, that it discourages you because you think… there’s no way I’ll be able to catch up now. I made that mistake joining a productivity membership site, then made my goal to create 100 articles in a day (and succeeded) and a lot of the members suddenly said, “I was going to write 10 this month… now I’ll never get caught up.”
You are guaranteed to lose if you compare yourself to someone else. Instead of trying to get caught up or get ahead of a certain person, figure out what they’re doing right so you can be headed in the same direction as them.
Robert, I’m so glad you were able to share this information in your immutable style. It was just what I needed to be reminded today. Our choice of FEAR or FAITH is just that . . .a choice. You can’t have both .. . only one. Doing it one step at a time is awesome. And the exhilaration of each success builds on the next.
I liked your band analogy. I used my nervousness to focus my emotions while playing piano concerts as a teen, too. I’d get so nervous my leg would bang the underside of the piano . . .LOL.
One of the thing that has helped me is to focus on my previous successes. I got through those challenges with success so I can also get through the next ones, too.
Robert you have given me so much hope. Thank you for putting this together and sharing it.
Thank you Robert,
This is big for me and I’ve got to do it.
“Robert Plank,
Sounds great Kevin, I’ve registered for your webinar.
One thing that I think will help you over time is, catch yourself whenever you make a negative statement.”
Wilco,
Kevin
I’m glad you are on the right track, Kevin.
Most of us just aren’t connecting enough and we need to get ourselves out there more, make more phone calls, send emails to more potential joint venture partners, and run webinars… “running out the clock” “putting in the time” “staying busy” is slow going… being live and different (better) than everyone else will accelerate everything for you.
Plank you really are a scoundrel!
Who else on the planet would even think of “closing comments” much less create a plugin/weapon for doing?
You are definitely my hero, and I don’t have very many of those now that Paul McCartney has gone off the deep end.
Hi Robert,
Your email to your list notifying us that you are closing the comments surely works, here I am commenting.
I really liked this post, where you’ve combined several psychological, NPL, and what you learn when you have a life coach. You’ve used conducting a webinar to wrap all those concepts together.
What I’ve learnt a lot of people find doing something for the first time very hard because that’s how they imagined it to be – hard – but once you do it, you realise it’s not so hard… you’ve moved from fear to trust and the more you practice you get better and better and you gain unconscious competence.
I also find anxiety and stress as something that hinders productivity, turning that into trust and a relax state is very beneficial to getting things done, at least for the first time.
Thanks for such a great post.
Ben Wan
Hi Robert, I have just finished reading your post and i thouroughly enjoyed it and can’t wait to impliment some of your strategies into my everyday business and personal life.
i’ve also forwarded it to my wife who has recently started a new career in real estate and i know she’ll get something out of it that will help her
Thank you once again
Cheers
DAMIAN
Hey Robert:
Pretty intriguing stuff. I thought I would respond with more a specific or practical thought about fear as it relates to the subject of webinars (since that was sort of where your thoughts began). I have lots of experience dong webinars and therefore wanted to speak more to that specific topic.
I believe there are a few elements that if addressed properly could really help a person overcome their fears when it comes to doing webinars.
* Be prepared – If you know your subject matter well then it instills confidence.
* Technology – Many people are fearful of the technology…and there are actually tons of moving parts involved in properly designing and executing a webinar. Like any project this truism follows here. If it is a core skill set you can and want to develop, then get the proper training and tools to do the job right. If it is not a core competency, then outsource it!
* Speaking – Any time I am presenting to people in public and to large groups of people I always try to focus on one person. If you can create a mindset that you are taking what you know and telling it to another person one-on-one, then it can remove the fears of actually speaking to large numbers of people. So, on a webinar, just talk like you were telling your best friend all about your subject. It also creates warmth and authenticity.
I have a lot more thoughts but hopefully this will help someone in their quest to overcome speaking in public and specifically on webinars.
P.S. Webinars is one of the very best ways to sell products online. I highly encourage people to consider this strategy in the mix.
To Your Success
Dave Foran
Dave, that is some great advice and it’s all easy to use for anyone starting a webinar.
Be prepared: Have a PowerPoint, basically read the bullets off the PPT especially if you’re new
Technology: I hardly use any of the features in GoToWebinar. I use polls every once in a while. Once you figure out how to share your screen, get your mic working, maybe even record it… then you won’t even have to touch the controls until maybe webinar 4 or 5. I tell lots of people to ignore comments people type in or even turn that feature off when they’re new.
Speaking: I have totally been around people who can have a normal conversation with me, and as soon I turn on the camera they get into politician, fake enthusiasm, talking to a big crowd mode, and I’m thinking… what happened?
Those are three easy obstacles anyone can tackle right away.
Great post. Easily your best to date. I’m in the process of putting a program together for baseball, that deals with issues of confidence and emotions, and how they affect ball players.
At the same time, the post allowed me to reflect on the reasons why I haven’t finished my project sooner! It was a nice kick in the butt!
Keep it up and thanks!
Thanks for replying to my comment Robert. I really like the way that you have taken the time to engage with all of us, that’s very different to most blogs, and it’s highly engaging – I returned to this post and reread it and the comments at least ten times.
A friend of mine told me just the other day about a scary moment he faced, all the while telling himself ‘I am not ready.’ He went to see a mutual friend to ask his advice, and to ask if the friend thought he was ready. The friend said ‘No, you can never be ready. You can only be ready to leap’.
Robert
I do have to say that all of what you posted is true!
I could sabotage my life over and over if I let my “ego” get in the way.
You have a great way of looking at all the things we do not get things done.
Thanks for the post, and as usual I am just under your time limit LOL
Thanks
Jeanne
We have found that webinars are one of the most effective ways to find and persuade people who are good candidates for our phone business.
Fear may slow us down, especially fear of talking to our friends and neighbors. But the seemingly-impersonal act of talking to a microphone is easier for some people than the prospect of talking to real live people.
In addition to Robert’s many good ideas, just the “mechanical” difference of not being able to see your prospects may do you good.
Best Wishes,
Phil
Hi Robert,
Wow…my work in women who have lost a significant amount of weight (50 lbs or more) involves a lot of work on their self-confidence and self-esteem. While I’ve completed the weight-loss part of my journey, the move to complete confidence is still underway.
I’ve heard speakers talk about the process of moving from unconscious incompetence (you don’t know what you don’t know) through conscious incompetence (I know what I don’t know) to conscious competence (I know what I’m doing!) to unconscious competence (I make it look easy because I’m so comfortable with what I’m doing). Your diagram and the associated emotions made it clearer and reminded me of why I thought it was a great concept in the first place.
I am teetering between conscious incompetence and conscious competence. I know there is SO much for me to learn, yet I can function and be productive with what I DO know. I can help people through what I DO know and through my business, while still expanding my mind, my skills and my experiences so that I get even better day by day.
I agree that if we are not learning, growing and moving forward each and every day – even in small ways – then we are dying. I don’t intend to go before my time, and I certainly will NOT become one of the ‘walking dead’…simply existing and refusing to experience the joy of learning and applying new things.
Thanks for the reminder, and the new information.
Robert,
I just finished a conference where encouraging business owners to start doing webinars was like suggesting they build a rocket in their backyard. Really great of you to post something this good to help folks get over the initial pull against starting. Thanks for your passion for helping people.
Well done!
Steven Sanchez
Robert,
This is a very good post, although, a little long winded. 🙂
I think you are definitely right though and it all goes back to taking action. Unfortunately, many people get busy implementing too many things and not focusing on doing one thing really well. I know I’m guilty of this in some areas of my business.
I have been running webinars for about the last 12 months with mixed results. I have not been as consistent with keeping them scheduled regularly though and am trying to focus on that for 2011.
Webinars are a great way to connect with your current newsletter subscribers, customers, and potential new leads.
Keep up the great work Robert.
Marshall
Hi Robert,
Very nice post, and I agree with you. I’ve tried to rid myself of negative emotions as quick as they pop up. That way I’m able to stay positive most of the time. This makes life more pleasant.
Gerri
Thanks Robert,
I was working on a blog post when I read this so, I had to steal your thoughts and re-purpose them and incorporate them for my niche.
I gave you credit and a link back to this post for the use.
If you have a problem with it just let me know and I’ll do something different. I’m still working on it so it’s not live yet anyway.
Emotions are powerful motivators and demotivates as well. Anyway thanks for your prospective on emotions.
Hi Robert,
That is some very needed information.
I’ve thought many times about doing one for people with Multiple Sclerosis that may be eligible for VA benefits.
There are so many veterans that could receive Compensation from the VA, even though it wasn’t diagnosed while they were on Active Duty.
I think you have given me the motivation to do it.
I’ll have new site up next month about: “Living With Multiple Sclerosis”
Thanks again,
Neil Adams
Wow, had to read that a couple of time for it to sink in, great post Robert. I have tried to identify the activator of the self confidence I need to stay the course, I am not “scared” to fail. I continually have to remind my self my “failures” are making up the backbone of my success.
Robert,
Great presentation and quality information. While I do not necessary agree with the psychologists, I can respect the data.
Not sure that I agree with the conclusion or at least I feel that my resistance to webinar is more related to my own experience in attending webinars.
But keep up the good work and great info.
Carl